detachment

On this the day of Detachment, (Seven Spiritual Laws by Deepak Chopra)  I was contemplating something a heard from a friend. "Don't forget to enjoy where you are now,  you had wanted so badly to be where you are now." I had enjoyed hearing this bit of wisdom and tucked away for further contemplation. What a great reminder as we evolve at our own pace that it's not an overnight process. Rejoice in the now as you worked hard to get to this spot. Enjoy the view and relish your rewards. Then get out there and move on!

Now, flash back to starting a new routine over the summer, just for 3 day reset dear Trista Thorp  had offered. I grabbed that chance not knowing what a routine reset might mean to me.  I had been wanting to get up early and take a morning walk for the last 2 years since I moved to our new place.  With three kids, the logistics have always been daunting. Did someone wander into our bed overnight, so I have to sneak out from under a little sleeping angel? Is my husband traveling so I am the only grown up in the house? All these possibilities bogging me down and I was having fears about making it a reality even though I wanted it and my life had settled down into a nice routine.  Then I made it happen (thanks Trista!).  I began to walk for the mile loop around my neighborhood. After a while, I added an extra long addition. I began running on the downhills.

A little further back in my history, I have NEVER liked running in my whole life. I didn't do it in P.E. in school. I was pretty much opposed to it for most of my life, using other ways to make my body enjoy speed. I was a swimmer and skater boarder, not a runner. That was then. So I am detaching from who I have been to become who I can be...

Here I am in January 2015, enjoying running, detaching from my fear of not having enough energy in my day after exercise, detaching from my idea of who I am and running toward who I am becoming.

May your day be blessed with detachment from past clingings, past ideas, past fears, past experiences as you launch into who you are becoming. Go ahead and blossom, dear flower. It's time to show your beauty!

My personal morning statement
I am strong. I am powerful. I am beautiful. I am prosperous.  I am abundant. I am patient. I am understanding. I am listening. I am excited about my future.
Written on my mirror...

cadence

I am the earliest morning riser in my family of nearly all early risers. As I sneak out of the house, not wanting to wake a snoring soul, I grab my shoes in the dark and I sit outside on the concrete steps and tie my shoes in the cool darkness. This begins of my silent ritual. This morning, after I tied my first shoe, I realized I had accidentally pick up one older sneaker and thus nonmatching shoe. miraculously, I had one right and one left shoe.  I thought about sneaking back into get the matching shoe. I thought, "well, it's one for each foot", and I headed out for my morning walk.

As I'm walking I realize, I can feel the difference, rippling through my body from step to step.  sometimes its more pronounced in my foot, my hips, my overall balance of my body. They are both running shoes. The old one is 3 months old but they are not a pair. The difference both obvious and subtle. The more I pay attention, the more I realize the lesson in mindfullness.

As I make changes is my life and I strive to becoming the person I want to be, I sometimes see the new me shining and sometimes its like I'm wearing two different shoes. The old ways peeking through from time to time. The new rhythm becoming stronger as I don't note the difference in cadence. Sometimes, it is feeling the difference and consciously deciding what feels right for me, choosing my path again and again.   

May all those evolving continue consciously choosing the path again and again. You are strong and shining.

Winning

This morning, I won. I won against that little part of me that wanted to stay in bed, skip the walk and go back to sleep.  Every step out of my warm sleepy place, every step toward outside, I could hear the call, "It's not to late to go back to sleep..."  As I entered outside, I saw the breathtaking break of day, with jewel toned reds creeping out and still I hear that nagging voice. My body continued to move, perhaps to see what would happen if I walked when I didn't really want to go. About half way through my walk, I saw someone outside of their home alone, smoking and pacing.  My heart opened up and I realized how easy for anyone to get stuck in any pattern. The hard part comes in breaking into a new pattern, a healthy change, especially once our heart has seen how to overcome.

After getting out and moving, something I believe my body craves for sanity and balance, I realized I won.  If you have something your heart craves for sanity, for health, something you know you should do and yet you do not, try doing one day at a time, for you higher self. Step out into the unknown and into the right action. In your striving, may you be the winner.

Note to self:
Dear Doubting Little Voice in my head (aka Ego),
I heard you this morning, as I have in many other moments in my life. This morning as I disregarded your opinion, I realize something I already knew. You are not here for my highest good. You are not helping me strive to be better, to be the whole person I can be. In the wise words of others, if you don't have anything nice to say, please be quiet.
Love, Me

New moon

So, today is the day I was hoping for in the dark when I was surprised by the last smiles of the recumbent moon. Anticipation can be a powerful force to get your focused.

With this new moon, I am planting my intentions, those I have been gathering in anticipation for the dark place the moon becomes so as the moon's full light shines, my little seeds of intentions will bloom, just like they should.

What intentions have you been hiding in your heart, waiting for the right time? What has been calling to you? Don't let your ego talk you out of your grand and rightful intentions. You are brave and stong and beautiful. Let your intentions sing out and become your destiny.

For further inspiration, here is my long time favorite inspirational quote:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are all born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in just some of us, it's in everyone. And as we let our own life shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
Marianne Williamson

No need to wait for next month or next year, plant those desires so they become the opportunities you have been waiting to see. So, get our there with your little seeds and get planting!

Dark of night

I will admit that I do not own an alarm clock. I just wake up in my cozy bed well before every other person in my home (and probably my neighborhood). I fall into the extreme morning person category.  So, I spend my morning time fully awake in the stillness and I am thankful for the darkness of the night, where the stars shine bright down upon my path. This morning as I was walking, I was excited to be without the moon. Don't get me wrong; I love the moon. As a moon lover, I enjoyed the recumbent sliver yesterday and assumed it was a new moon morning.
My mind began racing with ideas...What do I want this month? what goal lies in my path? what do I really, really REALLY want? Just as I was rounding the last bend on my walk, like a little knowing smile in the sky, the moon shone down to meet me. I have a little more time to ponder and to meditate on this question.
The darkness of the morning is a fall occurrence. As I walk in the summer, I enjoy dawn's early light and the coming of the morning greeting me, as do other people out moving their bodies. The beauty of the darkness for me is the contrast. The brightness of the stars and the amazing moon loving me from above.
As you find your stillness and silence, what do you really want?

Travels tip: plan the first three days

In honor of all the upcoming Thanksgiving travel, I offer a bit of my travel wisdom, earned the hard way. May your own road trip be less bumpy.

For every trip, focus on the first three days. They are generally filled with a bit more whining, neediness, grouchiness and lack of patience. The uncertainty of change does that to little people (and big people alike). The rhythm of their routine and the certainly of their little world make them feel safe and comfortable, resulting in a calm child who is able to listen and respond.

In your new local, set up a regular routine to mimic home. Find regular places for everyday routines to help anchor your small people. Put toothbrushes in a place kids can find, shoes and coats in a place they can reach and talk about the new locations so they can hear where everything goes. As my children have grown, we work together to find "the shoe home" in a hotel. Creating and honoring the order amidst the changes helps to calm the chaos. You are also helping to make them better travelers.

By being mindful of this need for extra time, you can stack your plans accordingly. Allow for a smidgen of extra cuddle time in your schedule and be prepared for a lots of deep breathes and redirection time. Knowing what is coming can help you brace yourself for a couple of bad days knowing the light is coming. I also find that day two can be worse than day one with day three being milder(read=nonlinear progression). This is assuming sleep is happening; extra sleep helps this flow. A sleep deficit can continue the whiney and unhappy behavior.

With this rule in mind on a short trip, I try to have shorter outings and expect some plans get scrapped due to irritable travelers. On a longer trip, I have a looser schedule for the first few days, knowing I can pack more into later days.

Don't forget this rule applies to returning to home and settling back into your regular rhythm.

"I'm guessing it's again my turn to win some or learn some" Jason Mraz, I'm yours

The countdown begins

I thought months ago, or perhaps I should say, my ego, decided July would be a good time to move. Just enough time to enjoy a bit of San Francisco summer and say goodbye to friends, and just enough time to settle before child number two's birthday, August 1 and enjoy rest of summer. Hello ego, didn't you get the memo... After finding just the right house and getting into contract, I watched all the timelines slide into oblivion. Now we sit, well past the 45 day close still in San Francisco and only a vague estimation of when the move might really happen. I've relaxed into uncertainly and breathed into what will be. Maybe that was the lesson this time. I have two more weeks of shuffling papers and sorting out old shampoo before I put the final items into boxes. The added bonus I must remember to add back into my so called regular life post move and sans moving is the purge. Not the spring cleaning (or in our house chinese new year) type of purge resulting in a tidy house filled with cupboards of good intentions. I mean the purging of all that is not serving you now. Not keep those thing you might want or need or have a random use for some day. Let it go to someone else who needs it. Maybe it all lies in committing to having less. Still contemplating that one. I'm all planning and details while running the summer camp program for my three. Daily adventures are a must. Bonus if we can squeeze in a last visit from an old friend. I get the feeling the small people in the house are done saying goodbye to everyone and maybe there is a lesson for us all. In my family, when we leave my grandparent's farm, after much photos taking, hugs and chats, we wave to each other in the driveway and out into the road(well really it's a highway) until no one can see each other. Maybe that's what we are doing now, soaking in the last ounce. Or perhaps the little people think it just a long game of moving and they are ready to play house. Maybe we all need to work on our patience... Deep cleansing breaths all around as we move forward in the cue while waiting our turn